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How self-reflection helped me grow as a mom and a professional?

Updated: May 14, 2023



Have you ever thought about how a seed, buried deep in the soil, thrives? It pushes through the darkness, defying all odds, and eventually, it emerges into the sunlight, stronger and more resilient than ever. That was my life, in a nutshell, over the first two years during and after my daughter's birth.


I found myself suddenly alone, pregnant and facing the daunting prospect of motherhood in the midst of a painful separation. The whirlwind of emotions, ranging from the joys of nurturing new life within me to the sorrows of a marriage dissolving, were overwhelming. The journey of pregnancy, already a rollercoaster of hormonal and physical changes, was further complicated by the solitude I had to endure.


Through the quiet nights and the long days, I navigated through my pregnancy alone, my heart heavy with the weight of my circumstances, yet hopeful for the life blossoming inside me. I gave birth to my beautiful daughter, a moment both terrifying and exhilarating, and found myself plunged into the chaotic and exhausting world of post-partum life, again, alone.


These challenging circumstances would have been enough to break the spirit of many, but they did not break mine. Instead, they shaped me, toughened me, and helped me discover strengths and capabilities I had been unaware of.

Following the birth of my daughter, I took a hiatus of one and a half years from my professional life. This was a period of deep introspection, of delving into the core of my being, of making peace with my past, and envisioning a path forward for my daughter and me.


I faced the mirror, not just to look, but to truly see myself, with all my strengths and vulnerabilities laid bare. It was a grueling process, but ultimately a liberating one.


I wrestled with questions of identity, self-worth, and purpose, and as I confronted these issues, I started to understand myself better. I learned to accept my imperfections, to celebrate my resilience, and to embrace the opportunities that lay ahead. I began to appreciate the woman I had become - a survivor, a mother, a woman of strength and courage.


As I took my first tentative steps back into my professional life, I felt like a phoenix rising from the ashes. I was not the same person who had left. I was stronger, wiser, and more determined. My experiences, though fraught with hardship, had gifted me with a newfound sense of self-confidence and purpose.


Instances where self-reflection became a guiding light for me:


1️⃣ Embracing Vulnerability - One of the first instances of profound self-reflection came during the early days of my pregnancy. Alone and scared, I had to face the reality of my situation. I recognized my vulnerability, not as a sign of weakness, but as a testament to my human condition. I allowed myself to grieve my lost relationship, to fear the uncertainty of my future, and to express the loneliness that came with my predicament.


This acceptance of my feelings helped me to channel my energies into nurturing my unborn child and preparing myself for the journey of motherhood. This was my first victory, the first time I chose not to give up but to grow.


2️⃣ Rediscovery of Inner Strength - The second instance came during the post-partum period. Dealing with sleepless nights, constant feeding, and the overwhelming responsibility of caring for a newborn, I found myself teetering on the edge of despair. However, during one particularly tough night, as I sat nursing my child, I found myself reflecting on my situation.


I realized the immense strength I had shown by single-handedly bringing a life into this world and caring for it. This realization, this rediscovery of my inner strength, became my anchor. It reminded me of my resilience and ability to adapt and thrive in challenging situations, and it gave me the motivation to continue.


3️⃣ Reentry into Professional Life - As I began contemplating my return to the professional world after an 18-month hiatus, self-reflection played a pivotal role in charting my course. I had been through a tumultuous journey - emotionally and physically - and I knew that my approach to my professional life needed to be as resilient and self-aware as my personal one had been.


Understanding my core values: Through self-reflection, I revisited my core values and how they could align with my career goals. I asked myself what truly mattered to me, what kind of work environment I thrived in, and how I wanted to contribute to society through my work. This process helped me to redefine my career aspirations and to look for opportunities that matched my personal and professional values.


Identifying my strengths: The process of self-reflection also helped me to identify and acknowledge my strengths. I had navigated through a challenging pregnancy, post-partum period, and separation - all of which had honed my resilience, problem-solving, and multitasking abilities.


I realized that these were not just personal strengths but could be translated into professional competencies as well. This renewed understanding of my capabilities gave me the confidence to re-enter the professional world.


Learning from past experiences: Reflecting on my past work experiences, I identified areas where I had excelled, as well as those that needed improvement. I realized that I thrived in a collaborative environment, was good at project management but needed to work on my short temper. This understanding allowed me to target specific skills during my hiatus, through practice, which would be useful upon my return to work.


Balancing work and personal life: Having a child to take care of brought a new dimension to my life. Self-reflection helped me understand the need for a healthy work-life balance. I knew that I wanted a role that was fulfilling but also allowed me the flexibility to be there for my child. This influenced my job search, steering me towards roles and companies that valued work-life balance.


Rediscovering my passions: During my period of self-reflection, I found myself revisiting old hobbies and interests that had fallen by the wayside over the years. These activities, whether it was doodling, drawing, or writing provided a much-needed outlet for my emotions and creativity.


As I invested time in nurturing these passions, I experienced a renewed sense of joy and fulfillment. This reawakening not only helped me cope with my circumstances but also reminded me of the importance of self-care and personal growth. It motivated me to never give up, and instead, to continue exploring and nurturing my interests.


Setting personal goals: As I continued to reflect on my life, I began setting personal goals for myself, both short-term and long-term. These goals, which ranged from improving my physical fitness to advancing in my career, gave me a sense of purpose and direction.


Every small accomplishment along the way boosted my confidence and determination, inspiring me to continue striving for growth and self-improvement. The process of setting and achieving goals served as a constant reminder that I was capable of overcoming adversity and that I could create a brighter future for myself and my child.


Reentering my professional life after such a significant break was no small task. But the introspective journey I had embarked on provided me with clarity and direction. As I stepped back into the professional arena, I did so with a stronger sense of self, a clearer understanding of my career goals, and a confidence born out of self-reflection and personal growth.


My journey through pregnancy, post-partum, and self-reflection was arduous, but it was also transformative. I wouldn't wish my struggles on anyone, but I wouldn't trade my newfound strength and self-understanding for anything.

This is my story, my testament to the resilience of the human spirit, and my message of hope and empowerment to anyone going through a similar ordeal.


This is my tale of rebirth, of restarting life after separation, of finding light in the darkest of times, and ultimately, of the triumph of the human spirit.


If you think, self reflection can help you as well, down the eBook and grab an opportunity to get 75% discount (Code-SELFREFLECT)


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